Flag question
My mother has been dead 23 years next month. All I have of her is a cedar chest with the remainder of her worldly belongings. Her discharge (air force) paperwork, her HS diploma, cards from her long hospitalization, her AF medals, funeral program, condolence cards... and the flag. The one from her funeral.
It's MY flag. Mine to do with whatever I want. I've done nothing with it, because I can't decide what to do with it.
It's been folded and thrown in a chest for a quarter of a century. It's been moved, retucked, and not really taken care of. It's still folded, but not really tight and neat like it should be. This is why I don't know what to do with it.
I want to put it in a shadow box. I want to display it, it is important to me, regardless of what my years of 'neglect' may seem to attest.
My question... should I leave it as is, or have it refolded?
It was folded at her funeral, as her honor, and presented to my father. This in itself is special and makes me feel like I should leave it as is. But, it doesn't do her, or the flag, the honor it deserves in its current state. Which makes me think I should have it refolded.
We have an air force base nearby. I guess I can call and have someone refold it for me. Of course, I might be completely off base and this thing not be possible. I don't know, I've never really researched it.
What do you think? And CAN it be refolded? What would I do? Just call the AFB and tell whoever answers what I want done, and bounce around till I find the right contact?
posted by Estelle @ 7/07/2008 11:20:00 PM
5 Comments:
I'd call the base and ask for the connection to the chaplain. They should be able to help you with somebody to fold it.
I work for a f*refighters union - you could also call your local and ask if you brought it by if somebody there could do it. Or a VFW.
delurking... http://www.legion.org/national/americanflag/folding
that should help you get the job done on your own.
Au contraire, those flags they present at military funerals are FAR too large for one woman to fold unassisted without laying them down, which isn't considered proper flag etiquette. Also, those men and women who fold those flags at military funerals are pros and can create a perfectly standardized, rigid triangular bundle that will fit perfectly in a shadow box on the first try. I agree that the base chaplain would be the go-to person, and can probably find you some guys and/or gals who will be more than happy to oblige--it really only takes them a few seconds and while I am an atheist who doesn't hold by symbolic value of tangible items (like I try not to let my flag touch the ground because my dad was military and taught me NEVER to do that, but I don't freak out if it happens by accident), I think it might be the nicest way to honor your mother's memory, by having it done "just so." My only other thought would be that if it's come partly loose over time it might have creases in the wrongish places that would make it difficult for them to get that exact triangular bundle--if I were you I'd try maybe hanging it and going over it with a garment steamer to release the wrinkles (dunno that I'd have the ovaries to put it in even a cold wash with Woolite; CERTAINLY I wouldn't risk the dryer because you wouldn't want it to shrink or get twisted up, but maybe a wash to get the dust and wrinkles out?). Or perhaps when you've explained the situation they will have a particular way of getting around those issues and in that case I would go with their recommendation over mine :) I think we're a lot alike, Estelle--if I'm going to do something then dammit I'm going to do it RIGHT (carseats included--I've been swapping carseats around for over seven years now with three different bottoms to accommodate, and once my kids are too big to rear-face I just sit down in them my own self to get the belts tight, and I don't care if I AM seven months pregnant or someone is laughing, it's just the best way to get the job done! I can't tell you how many times I've been mocked, but if I shake the seat I want it to shake the frame of the damn CAR!). Your carseat tips have been something I've used to settle arguments before (because I'm obnoxious enough that if I notice a friend's child's seat wobbling in its moorings I'll totally say something--better that than the alternative!), and when installing my second child's infant seat, which was a brand I was not personally familiar with (the configuration was a bit odd) I consulted your guide and guess what? We got rear-ended on the way home from the poor babe's two-month checkup and while I got a sore neck (and a fat insurance check for a fleck of paint off the bumper of a car where that was NOT going to stand out), the two-month-old didn't even wake up from the impact (of course I still gave the police officer who arrived on the scene the hand while I called our pediatrician, who said that it was okay to gently try and wake the baby with foot-tickling, and if they responded okay and hadn't even been awakened by the impact then no need to even come back to the office)(the baby was mad to have the post-shots nap interrupted, and I ended up having to breastfeed in front of several police officers, my three-year-old, who kept feeling the need to explain EXACTLY what I was doing to ANYONE who would listen, and the stoned-looking teenage boy who hit us (and whose dad probably killed him when he got home that night). The police were visibly uncomfortable but too bad for them; the teenager on the other hand looked downright HORRIFIED. Too bad for him, heh.
http://www.gettysburgflag.com/Folding_Flag.php
This will tell you how to fold the flag.
I bought a triangle case for Narda's dad's flag, from here:
http://tinyurl.com/562zmd
bada bing, bada boom.
We didnt refold the one from my Father in law. I just bought a shadow box and left it as is. I think it has more meaning if it isn't disturbed.
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