Work... issue
I'm reluctant to blog something about my job, but I know I have never once mentioned the name and I feel pretty certain I have never given any information substantial enough to identify my place of employment.
I first asked HR for some time off back in December, giving nearly a year notice. As you see, DECEMBER. As in, before she was even pregnant. But because my company DOES NOT like to give unpaid time off, and because I am not eligible for FMLA, I inquired about time away. I quoted a company policy which states that unpaid time away will be granted for significant life circumstances and/or personal/family reasons in which FMLA does not apply. So, I applied.
And it was denied. Reason being, no baby yet. And, "other reasons." I was told to "touch base" when the time is closer.
So, new manager (my old manager was totally on board) and I meet last week. I brief her on the situation, she already knew. Manager is on board, director is on board. I apply, they sign the paperwork. First I'm told to prove I've adopted the child (that, legally, does not exist). When I make it clear that that can't happen, I am told to come over ON MY OWN TIME to the HR office (in another building) to meet with them. This annoyed me, because NO ONE that I know has EVER clocked out for a meeting in HR, for any reason.
So, I clock out, I go over there. The manager is meeting with her boss, and I am told that two weeks unpaid time is hunky dory. I was leary, as I had nothing in writing. I told her to send an email. I was told, in this meeting, that I should save my PTO. That was all that was said about PTO. Well, duh. Of course I am going to save it. I was also chastised for giving "too much" notice, even though the policy states to give as much notice as possible for a foreseeable event. But apparently I took the policy "too literally."
So I get an email yesterday, stating, among other things, that I am FORBIDDEN to use ANY PTO before the baby is born. HUH? So, I speak to my manager and director, and I am told to email to clarify, since that was NEVER mentioned, and is unreasonable at best. So I mention that a) I am still under a doctor's care for surgery, and going to twice weekly physical therapy, and b) I or my child might still fall ill. I won't be taking any planned vacations, but telling me I cannot take any time off for any reason?
This morning, I get an email back. Stating that she SPECIFICALLY mentioned that I cannot take ANY PTO because I need to save it for the two week leave that is apparently no longer unpaid. She also states that she checked my schedule and all my schedule history and since I have never been sick before, it's safe to assume I will not be sick again. And since I go in at ten three days a week, there is no reason that I can't go to physical therapy or any other appointment before work. But the FINAL... the final straw...
"As far as sickness for your child, you were told to contact me and discuss it then. No unpaid time off will be given for any child care as technically THIS CHILD IS NOT YOURS."
First off, I was talking about CHARLIE. And it is none of her business what my relationship, legal or otherwise, is to MY son.
I got up, called my manager to tell her I was LEAVING my desk, she didn't answer. I passed someone on the way out the door and told her to tell the boss I was leaving for a few moments. I then watched from the cafeteria because I knew, eventually, the boss would be coming in. Sure enough, she did. She basically just told me to follow her outside. She read the email, found it unreasonable/uncalled for/inappropriate/et cetera. She talked to the director, who immediately went to talk to the VP, who (at last I was told) would review with the personnel officer for something that was obviously NOT right to say. I told my manager and director I would NOT deal with this particular HR manager in the future. It is obvious by that statement alone that she has an issue with me. She said something to me yesterday that was very out of line that I tried to brush off... but with this, I realize it was probably just as mean spirited as it sounded. The manager also asked me to print all the emails I had with this particular person and she was going to take it to the company lawyer (as when the lawyer spoke to her, she told the lawyer that I never requested a personal leave and was just asking about FMLA but that that was many months ago).
I... don't even know, really. I LIKE my job. I am a good employee, well liked by most people. This place has an insane turnover due to very procrustean politics, but I have been there for a year at this point and do my job well. But if this is how I am to be treated... it's not worth it.
My manager is amazing, the director is pretty darn awesome as well. But they can't force HR to let me take time off.... I don't know what to do. I'm not even sure it's worth my time and energy anymore to fight it. And if this company is going to be so anti-family... do I really want to be there? I don't know.
Any ideas?
Labels: Fraggle Rock, Soapbox, The Firm
We have heartbeat
So, she is just shy of 13 weeks pregnant, and the heartbeat visit was yesterday. Ornery little shit that thing is, took the midwife forever to find it, she was getting concerned that she wouldn't! But it's good and strong, just a VERY low lying baby that is still making camp behind the pubic bone.
Charlie insists it's a girl. He talks about his baby sister all the time. I do hope he'll not be too crushed if it's a boy. He'll probably still call it his baby sister, knowing Charlie.
And to answer Roberta's question... nope, I'm not into the little things this time around. I don't notice them even. I can't recall how pregnant she is without asking her or doing math. I could tell you down to the day with Charlie. She says she feels its little flutterings. With Charlie, I wanted all the time to feel him move when he started. With this baby, the thought of feeling it move creeps me out. I've bought it almost nothing (though, to be fair, we have everything it needs) but I have ogled some new diapers that weren't around when Charlie was in them (oh, by the way, a month solid now with no diapers except overnight and naptime). Today at the market I did buy it something.... a little orangey brown hemp tee shirt with little brown baby feet on it that read "Play in the dirt." I got Charlie a matching one, though his has baby hands instead of baby feet.
I want it to be born on 13 November (EDD is 18). Charlie has my dad's name, the next on should have his birthday, right?
Labels: Fraggle Rock
Heh, my boss read my blog
So I was having a meeting with my boss the other day (she's new to the department, and she rocks! I was quite fond of the one she replaced, but I really like her!) about how the company steadfastly refuses to let me take any time off when the baby is born (post for another day...) and we got to talking about Charlie's health (she asked if the new baby had the same father, I said no and explained why). She said she'd love to read some of the stories, so I told her to Google my name. I knew that my name wouldn't bring her to my blog, but that the donor number would. I considered this, briefly, but decided it was no big deal. I really didn't think she would google the donor number.
I was wrong. She told me the next day that she had googled me, and found the stories and found... my blog. And my Flickr account. Thank goodness I took down those naked Batman pics of myself!!
So, I've been found. No more grousing about work (have I ever really done that) or anything like that. Oh well.
So, boss lady... if you're reading this... can I have next week off?
Labels: I'm A Dork, Random weirdness, The Firm
Cute Charlie story
I feel like I have let my blog die. I HAVE let my blog die. But... life, you know.
Anyway, this is just too cute not to share.
Our dad complete redid our yard (I love retirement!) and is pretty much done. New sod, new mulch, landscape timbers, topsoil everywhere, et cetera.
So last week he was dumping the topsoil (he bought a truck, don't ask) and Charlie was yelling at him and supervising. I had to be to work at ten, so I left Charlie outside on his swingset to watch dad, and went inside to get dressed.
At some point, Charlie had to pee. My dad told him what to do.
So I go back outside about 15 minutes later. Charlie is naked, covered in dirt, and yells at me "Mama! I go pee pee on grass! It's what boys do!"
Thanks dad.
Wow...
Notices are handy... but this one is baffling.. and hilarious.
**THE FOOD ALLERGY & ANAPHYLAXIS NETWORK SPECIAL FOOD ALLERGY ALERT NOTICE**
PEANUT and ALMOND ALLERGY ALERT
APRIL 10, 2008
Cracker Barrel Old Country Store, Inc., is recalling “Chocolate Covered
Almonds” due to undeclared peanuts and “Chocolate Double-Dipped Peanuts”due to
undeclared almonds.
These products were available at all Cracker Barrel Old Country Store
locations in 41 states.
These products were packaged in a clear, 5-oz. bag with a red-and-white
diamond pattern on the label.
Consumers may return the product to the place of purchase for a full
refund. Consumers with questions may call (800) 333-9566.
Labels: Random weirdness
I can walk!
I got my cast changed today. He wasn't thrilled about me walking, but I told him that my elbow was about to defect and join the Soviet Union (reforming just for this occasion) and that I was walking anyway because I listen to my body more than a doctor. Walking didn't hurt, the crutches made me blind with pain in the elbow. I went with walking.
So, he put on a super duper mega cast, tight as all get out, and a boot, and told me to give it a try. Well, it's like walking with one platform shoe and one flip flop, but other than that it's okay. I can manage. WAY better than the crutches.
I carried my baby today for the first time in two weeks. I liked that part.
Amey cleaned our house and my dad raked the front yard (we told him we'd pay for his cruise if he did all our yard work. We were looking at about $1000 for a pro, so he agreed to give it a go), so I don't feel like complete white trash anymore.
And I think my baby might have gone and potty trained himself. He hasn't pooped in a diaper in over a week, and he only pees in his diaper when we're out. If we're home, he hits the toilet. Wahhh!!!! He can't grow up yet!!
What's in there?
DSC07989
Originally uploaded by splashandwally.
Charlie did this to every single one of those lights. All. Of. Them. Every fifteen feet. On both sides of the boat. Every. Single. Light. With mama following behind in her 1965 wheelchair battling a headwind.
I hate everything
Our whole household is falling apart.
I got to work today, and laid my head on the table in the breakroom and cried. And I sat there for half an hour, a huge no no.
I went back to my desk and alternatively cried and laughed like a druggie for the next two hours.
I hurt everywhere. My back, arms, ankle, hips, feet.... everywhere. I can't take care of my baby. I can't carry him or pack his bag or anything. I can't even get around my own damn house. My house was built in 1913... there was no such thing as handicapped. They just let you die.
AJ is so sick, she can barely move. It was the same way with Charlie... she just doesn't do pregnant well. She's tired all the time, and inhaling makes her nauseous. All she's eaten in days is half a bagel and some dried apricots.
The house is so messy. We haven't done laundry in a week, it's not even fitting in the hamper. The dishes are everywhere. I washed diapers this morning because we were OUT. Which is really bad considering he's been using the toilet regularly. My dad keeps promising to come over and rake the yard but nothing yet. We need to vacuum, mop, laundry... it's horrible.
Neither of us expected this. We knew I'd be relatively helpless (though the surgery ended up being more complex than originally thought, which means I can't walk like I was told I could), but didn't expect her to be as well. It's just... bad.
It's so bad she called Amey and asked her to come over and clean. We've never done that. But we can't keep up right now. Work, school, house, sick, broken.... Charlie is mad at me because I can't play with him, I can'tcarry him... I hate this.
It was a mistake. I wish I hadn't done this. I'd go back and take it back just to not have my life this out of control.
I call myself all the time
I couldn't find my cell phone this morning (it was on the charger... imagine that) and called it. While calling, I thought about the stupid "I never call myself" excuse people use for not knowing their phone number.
It's always annoyed me and made me think the person is just a lazy idiot. You don't know your own phone number? Because you "never call" yourself? HUH?!
I never throw myself a surprise birthday party. I knowmy birthday.
I have never stolen my own identity. I know my social security number.
I don't mail myself Christmas cards. I know my address.
What the hell kind of cop out is "I never call myself?"
For the record, I sometimes pause when asked for my phone number. Not because I don't know it, but because I'm trying to decide which one to use. My cell? AJ's cell? Home? Work? Home 2? Email? But I assure you that I know ALL of them. As well as the numbers for most of my family and friends. Even if I rarely call them.
Rant over.
Labels: Random weirdness, Soapbox
Surgery went well
All is well. Moderate discomfort, no real pain. Mostly just awkwardness. He gave me another Rx for more vicodin... that now gives me 100. Holy too many narcotics!
Cast goes to my knee, gets removed in two weeks and then another one put on. Fought over the pregnancy test, again. Idiocy.
Charlie's not happy about my "ouchie" and is mad that it won't come off. But he is beyond thrilled that he is going on the big boat with papa tomorrow.
Hopefully there is little pain and no complications and we have a blast on our cruise! Thanks for all the well wishes!
